Canada's Tory Party: Asses or Idealogues?

/ Thursday, April 29, 2010 /
When one follows the attempts at policy-making by the Conservative minority government, inevitably the question gets asked: Are they a collection of asses or gang of idealogues? Well we here at NM&P have come to the conclusion, after much study, that they are a gaggle of Assalogues.

A beggar's crew of the self-interested, the entitled, the smug, they are Canada's Assalogues! And they do this yeoman-like work almost 60 or 70 gruelling days a year. Their courage knows only the bounds of their collective cowardice. The proud the few the 32%... the Assalogues!

In their latest display of the unweildly combination of assholery and "We're gonna' shove this down your throat," the tories have decided for all Canada that they will withhold money from groups that fund abortion in the developing world as part of their programs to improve women`s health. This provoked a sharp rebuke from the opposition in Ottawa and international aid agencies, who said it is irresponsible to deny the service to women in impoverished countries.

Mark Fried, policy co-ordinator for Oxfam in Canada, said he's discouraged by the federal government's position, adding that “imposing Canada's ideological beliefs is ridiculous.” To an Assalogue however this is meaningless criticism, mere blah, blah, blah!

In spite of the fact that these groups are doing what they can to aid the maternal health of women who are often the victims of war, rape and extreme poverty, as well as reduce infant mortality this does not stand in the way of Harper and Conservative Party sanctimony. How could it? Assalogues never let reason stand in their way.

The fact that, "Canada's position will make tracking funding and administering aid a logistical nightmare for recipient countries," as Mr. Fried pointed out, mattters not. The issue first raised by Liberal MP Lise Zarac, who noted, "rape is a weapon of war," and accused the government of denying victims in places like Africa the rights to abortion that are afforded to Canadians, is of no consequence to the Assalogues.

Well aware that they are dealing with a weak and spineless opposition they lash back at unity of the three opposition parties with regard to the issue. “The maternal and child health initiative is moving ahead,” Mr. Abbott said, and “the only way it can get derailed is if the unholy coalition decides that they will continue to do this kind of demagoguery over an issue that nobody wants to debate.”  They are wrong about that  but that is a mere trifle to an Assalogue.

Tomorrow, Sanctiholes!




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